By: Jenny Hernandez
I tried hard to recall the last of it, where the
lights went from yellow to red and if I even
noticed when the green light changed. I can’t
remember. The last time I saw you, you kissed
me goodbye and said “love you” like it was the
beginning and it’s merely the last I remember
of you. It’s been months and I’ve started to
lose the memory of what you felt like. What
you smelled like, what you even sound like. I
like to recite our old jokes out loud, and
nothing is the same anymore, but what do I
expect during transformation to keep around
the only thing that’s been missing this whole
time? I convinced myself for a while that you
took parts of me I had built all my own to
perfection. The happiness and the confidence,
the funny and the hopeful. I convinced myself
this chapter took a lot from me and that you
ran away with parts of me I can never get back.
To find that while yes, you have parts of me,
you did not have all of me and I've yet to meet
the new me. The one I get to put together
again. The me, I get to learn to love again and
shine new lights from. The me, who can still
love despite a heartbreak like this one. To be
quite honest, some days it’s still hard to
remember that idea of me you seemed to like,
and I wish I was her again for you, but who was
she?