A Heavy Substance

Updated: Apr 30, 2020

By Nada Aly—

You know how they say that the pleural cavities in your lungs have to be empty?

It’s fascinating really, they can’t even have air in them, or else you’ll be dead!

But I’m starting to think that’s not the case for me

You see, I don’t think these cavities are completely empty, or else I wouldn’t feel this overbearing heaviness in my chest all the time

Right? That has to be it.

And maybe, because these cavities have something in them (when they shouldn’t)

My body knows that there’s something wrong, and so the feelings of guilt, of shame, of sadness inside of me are my body’s response to this anomaly

Maybe my body’s hoping I’ll fix this issue, get surgery of some kind to clear my pleural cavities.

Maybe then I wouldn’t feel so heavy all the time

And maybe then I’ll be able to breathe right, free of the weights chaining my lungs down

Maybe when I can breathe properly, I won’t feel so tired all of the time!

I’ll have energy to work on my assignments, energy to smile, to feel, to do the things that made me who I am

Before the mysterious substance flooded my pleural cavities, that is.

Oh, I wonder how great it’ll be to feel like myself again!

Not this tired, worn, and weary soul

Well the issue isn’t in my soul, it’s in my body!

It has to be, because if the issue was with my soul, then boy would that be a lot harder to solve!

It can be fixed, it’s easy, I just have to find out what this heavy, mysterious substance is

The substance that invaded my lungs, weighing them down, along with my mind and my thoughts and stripping me of my identity until I became a poor imitation, a sad shadow of what I once was

And get rid of it, then boom! All is fixed

That has to be it, right? Right?

Or else,

What else could explain why I feel this way?

“Born in Saudi Arabia, Nada Aly spent her childhood living in three different countries. Aly is an aspiring author and poet, and draws inspiration from her experience growing up in diverse communities. Aly is currently majoring in Biology, and she hopes to pursue a career in the neuroscience field. Her interests range from swimming to writing to playing the piano.”

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